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Loved it She is extreme in her hospitality If you read the book and the only message you got was I need should to do it like Rosaria , then you have missed the point. I received a free copy of this book from the publisher via netgalley in exchange for an honest review I have been looking forward to reading this book first, because the author is one I ve admired from afar ever since I read her first book, Confessions of an Unlikely Convert second, because hospitality is a ministry dear to my heart I had high expectations for this book and sadly, it slightly disappoints Perhaps I m being nit picky and I apologize if I sound harsh, but I need to give my honest review It is perplexing because though I do not love the book, I do not have a problem recommending it to others I gave it a 4 on netgalley bec of this.I m not sure if this is promoted as such, but it is part memoir, part theology lesson, part christian living kind of book Interwoven are the theological basis, biblical illustrations and personal story about hospitality Mrs Butterfield is a good writer and could very well be the most qualified to talk about hospitality, but I still find issues in the book that I cannot give it a 5 Star rating.These issues are not theological in nature, so I can still in good conscience recommend the book For sure, it is highly engaging, saturated with Scripture, and convicting to the core I ve had to stop several times to repent for past sins in the area of hospitality and pray for God s grace to help me a better hostess I cried reading about her tumultuous relationship with her mother I especially love that she encourages us to not idolize safety and security, something American Christians are obsessed with We need to live our ordinary lives radically and one way we do that is through hospitality Here are some favorite quotes I know I can t save anyone Jesus alone saves, and all I do is show up Show up we must.Radically ordinary hospitality is this using your Christian home in a daily way that seeks to make strangers neighbors, and neighbors family of God It brings glory to God, serves others, and lives out the gospel in word and deed.Christians must learn to practice radically ordinary hospitality not only as the hosts of this world but, perhaps importantly, as its despised guests Let s face it we have become unwelcome guests in this post Christian world.God calls us to make sacrifices that hurt so that others can be served and maybe even saved We are called to die Nothing less.The job of an ally makes the cross lighter, not by erecting or supporting laws that oppose God s law, but by being good company in the bearing of its weight.Now for the disappointing partshere are just a few Perhaps this is unavoidable when writing a memoir, and I have a sensitivity to humble bragging because of my own pride problems, but I find her constant use of her own personal triumphs in hospitality as a little irksome I don t want to judge her motives, but it gets old when I read one hospitable act by the author after another She did use other people s examples, but it s mostly about her and her family s sacrifice and good works This is especially interesting because she talks highly of her husband who would not tarnish by bragging about it one s coming to faith through their hospitality on a blog post or on Facebook Kent is a Christian man Christian men do not steal glory from God This is the kind of news that moves mountains, something to be addressed in the sacred moment of table fellowship Her schedule seems unmaintainable Doing intentional ministry every day could exhaust even the most devoted Christian As a minister s wife, I understand that being in full time ministry is a 24 7 kind of job, and opportunities to serve could come at any moment But her way is to have something planned every day Maybe these are assumed, but I ask her, When does she devote time alone with her husband When does she foster one on one time with her kids It is hard to imagine she has time for them just by reading about her schedule.One of the characters she mentions in the book is Hank who starts as a grumpy neighbor and becomes a friend Later on, it is found out he was leading a secret criminal life I understand and admire the author s compassion for her friend, but her intent focus on this made her question the fairness of his incarceration, made her forget his serious crimes that hurt a lot of people His sins are somewhat downplayed Yes, as a Christian, he has been forgiven, but he still has to face the consequences of his sins She quotes and uses as a good example a Catholic priest who regarded hospitality as a spiritual movement, one that is possible only when loneliness finds its spiritual refreshment in solitude, when hostility resolves itself in hospitality, and when illusion is manifested in prayer This sounds mystical and, as an ex Catholic, I seriously have an issue promoting any of them.I found two typos principal when she meant principle, tails instead of tales. @Download Book É The Gospel Comes with a House Key ⚢ The Gospel Comes With A House Key Practicing Radically Ordinary Hospitality In Our Post Christian WorldAbout The Gospel Comes With A House KeyThe Word Hospitality Often Invokes A Scene Of A Gracious, Impeccably Fashioned Host Welcoming Guests Into A Beautifully Appointed Home Prepared With Perfectly Presented Meals However, When The Bible Calls Christians To Be Hospitable, It S Calling Them To Much In This Book, Rosaria Butterfield Invites Readers Into Her Home And Shows From Her Own Life And Experience How Radically Ordinary Hospitality Can Be A Bridge For Bringing The Gospel To Lost Friends And Neighbors Something That She Experienced Herself On Her Journey To Christ Such Hospitality Welcomes Those Who Look, Think, Believe, And Act Differently Than Us Into Our Own Everyday, Sometimes Messy Lives Christians Will Be Inspired And Equipped To Use Their Homes And Tables As A Way Of Showing A Skeptical, Unbelieving World What Love And Authentic Faith Really Look LikeTable Of ContentsPreface Radically Ordinary Hospitality Priceless The Merit Of Hospitality The Jesus Paradox The Vitality Of Hospitality Our Post Christian World The Kindness Of Hospitality God Never Gets The Address Wrong The Providence Of Hospitality The Gospel Comes With A House Key The Seal Of Hospitality Judas In The Church The Borderland Of Hospitality Giving Up The Ghosts The Lamentation Of Hospitality The Daily Grind The Basics Of Hospitality Blessed Are The Merciful The Hope Of Hospitality Walking The Emmaus Road The Future Of Hospitality Conclusion Feeding The The Nuts And Bolts And Beans And Rice This book had some very good parts and some bad I would love to discuss this book in a group And I would love having someone like Rosaria live in my neighborhood My best take away is a reminder that living Christianity should be costly I have to push myself I have to work hard I have to die to my self That s true with how I wife and how I mom And how I hospitality She made the point well that you should hospitality with sacrifice Also she gave good advice to just start anywhere if you re intimidated.Criticisms False dichotomies One example is in the beginning when they learn their neighbor across the street was running a meth lab She goes through a list of wrong things they could have done We could surround myself with fear What if the meth lab explodes and takes out my daughter s bedroom the room closet to the lab with it And then after the list But that of course, is not what Jesus calls us to do 19 LOL Actually, concern for my daughter not getting blown up by a meth lab is super god honoring And doing that does not mean I think other people are worse sinners than I, shouldn t be ministered to, couldn t be saved, etc Too prescriptive One of the endorsements she included even said this There are a few very long sections of Rosaria telling personal stories, that I think only barely thread the needle of connecting back to hospitality Ex Her cousin opening a gay bar, her relationship with her mom, an incident of church discipline The amount of detail was excessive for the points she made about hospitality The book would have been better without Rosaria s pretty numerous political opinions drug sentencing, environment, and immigration are some I readily remember I can think drug crime sentencing is not too harsh and still be a faithful Christian and a faithful practitioner of hospitality If she agrees with that sentence she did not make that clear to the reader. This book floored me Rosaria Butterfield casts a beautiful image of Christian home as ministry through ordinary, daily hospitality She strikes the perfect balance between practical details and lovely well read writing This book will be affecting me for years to come. Read 5 myths about hospitality I thought I would love this book I ve read Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert, the story of Butterfield s coming to faith in Christ, and I sat in on the hospitality workshop she led at a TGC conference I love that radical gospel hospitality was used so profoundly in her repentance And I admire her family s open doors approach to life and people, Christian and non Christian I have much to learn be challenged by here My lack of enthusiasm for this book lies in the tone of how she communicates throughout large chunks of the book I experienced her as too dogmatic about how Christians should practice gospel hospitality, maybe sounding prideful about her family s example I hesitate writing that because I believe she loves people in a way that puts me to shame And reading this has made me think about our family rhythms and how we could be hospitable in the spirit that she describes Worth the read. 4 1 2 stars This book is thought stirring and a deeply challenging call on hospitality to the stranger and outcast She calls us to love our LGBT neighbors with hospitality and hope of the gospel, not fearing or despising them This book was hard for me to put down I will read it again someday.The type of hospitality that Mrs Butterfield holds out before us is indeed radical She gives many, many examples of this in her own life So many in fact that sometimes the book felt like a memoir But this did not put me off, as I do love memoirs And Mrs Butterfield s conversion story is such a staggering example of God s grace that I would have read this book just to read of her current walk with Christ since writing Secret Thoughts I highly recommend reading her Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert before reading this one.I have a slight problem or two with this book, same as I ve seen others mention Mrs Butterfield does seem to brush off hospitality with like minded people In my own life however, most people do not even extend hospitality to other Christians, or even accept an OFFER of hospitality from other Christians I can t count the times I ve been flat turned down, and it is a very rare thing for my family to be invited into others homes And so I wish that like minded hospitality had been addressed at least as a starting point for those who aren t yet offering their homes to anyone, period Hospitality requires a level of humility because there is no way to have others in your home without exposing your own or your family s flaws And at least in my circles, no one wants to do even this small thing In short, Mrs Butterfield rightly holds up a high bar for us, especially those who believe hospitality is commanded but aren t reaching out to the strangers among us I wonder if this high bar will blow the minds of some who have yet to get their feet wet Like I said, very thought provoking book.Her testimony of ministering to her mentally ill mother was beautiful Her example as a helper to her pastor husband was fantastic and very interesting to me as well The transparency and truth she shared about her church s sin, the discipline of its leaders and the effects on the rest of the body, was humbly shared At times she mentions things that made me scratch my head as to what it had to do with hospitality For instance she mentions several times a disdain for social media Which I understood but it just didn t seem to fit flow with the book A time or two I felt like my hand was slapped and a tone of winsomeness was needed Just my opinion That s a hard balance for a writer.Overall I loved the book It was heavy on real life examples but I enjoyed them Mrs.Butterfield has a gift of hospitality that is highly exercised and I m thankful she shared her writing with us Parts of the book I thought, Wow, she is so brave to be saying these things I ve been dying to read this book since before it was even released the Gospel and hospitality two of my favorite subjects written by one of my favorite authors I couldn t wait.Now that I ve read it I think I m mostly disappointed While there were lots of good things about this book, for me it fell flat But, let me start with the good stuff Pros Her story about meeting her teenage son in a group home for the first time ripped my heart out and deepened my prayers for our hopeful future in fostering to adopt The last chapter was solid gold So helpful I wish the whole book had been like that Chapter 6, Judas in the Church, was also really good, though there were several times I wish she had been a little clear I have several situations that are definitely in the borderlands of hospitality but because it mostly revolved around how the Church should respond I was left wishing she gave some thoughts to how individuals within the church should respond I loved that this book didn t include any recipes or party ideas I loved that she was all about the messy home hospitality, mismatched cheap dinner ware, and cheap filling foods Cuz that s my kind of hospitality Neutral She s Presbyterian and I m Baptist so there is a whole element to this that is based in a very different set of theological ideas Covenantal theology Cons Guys, I m REALLY not trying to be nit picky, I wanted to love this and thought about not leaving a review but I m actually worried about some of this stuff I was not expecting what really ought to have been sold as a memoir I think, had it been billed that way, it would have been a better read for me I struggled with what, to me, came across as how to be hospitable like me I wish that the structure of the book had started with Jesus and the Gospel and what that means for our homes and churches, and THEN provided pictures that added a practical, tangible look at what that means Because it was written like a memoir it was SO WORDY Her stories lasted so long I forgot what point she was trying to make with them and sometimes didn t see that she made her point by the time she got to the end Part of why I wished it had been written in a traditional Christian living style is because Mrs Butterfield s world is not my world With every story I felt the chasm between the world she ministers in and the world my family ministers in My world is a lot poorer meth next door is the norm and mental illness is everywhere This is why I wish she had started with some broad, hard hitting truths the Gospel teaches us about hospitality so that they could be applied in any context Because of the way she continues to use herself as an example she becomes the picture to compare ourselves against rather than the gospel, and I think it s actually rather damaging Mrs Butterfield includes a breakdown of her week and it s enough to send anyone into a total mental breakdown My schedule is very, very full of hospitality and ministry, yet it doesn t come close to what she has going on Most concerning is the lack of time set apart to have quality time with her husband and children But I believe our family is our first ministry, those to whom we owe the highest level of hospitality and whose needs dictate to a degree how much and what kind of hospitality we offer to others To recommend otherwise in a book on hospitality, even by omission, is, I think, dangerous For example, my husband is chronically ill if I over filled our schedule he would be back in the hospital in a flash, my son would be an anxious mess and my third child, my baby, would go un held than he already is I found her response to parents concerns about our hospitality inadvertently exposing children to things they aren t ready for to be honestly offensive She brushes it off as sheltering and full of fear However, she sets up a straw man through using examples that support her position If Christian parents are afraid to have a LGBTQ person into their home, read what she says, because she s right BUT, if your concern is about safety and toxic people and those who would prey on your children that s a completely different matter For example, a little girl we were frequently bringing into our home was actively attacking my daughter and trying to get her in trouble and make her do things she shouldn t do, then lie and say they were her idea There are many, many times this sort of thing has happened during my efforts at hospitality, and I would love for a mom whose been there to give me direction and not tell me I m not trusting the covenant enough Like, really, what do I do I think I ask someone else in my church to reach out to that little girl and her family and protect my daughter but again, I would love direction on this I wish she had given concessions to seasons of life She put her schedule in there with no caveats or clarifications or even saying that I haven t always operated on this level Her youngest is 11, and several of her children are already saved and can join into this ministry with her For me, my oldest just turned five and I have two toddler boys None of them can help in any significant way with the hospitality and prep In fact, after we are finished with hospitality I have to work really hard to reassure them and reconnect with them and deal with whatever difficult stuff happened while we were being hospitable that I was not able to address at the time I wish she had given concession to people being in different places Perhaps most disturbing of all, and my only theological concern, was her take on headship In her words, headship is a result of the fall and is needed because of sin I HIGHLY disagree Ultimately, I think this book would have benefited from a better editor There were spelling mistakes and a lot of organization and flow problems and a lot of saying things too narrowly or saying things too broadly and not explaining what she meant A lot of the paragraphs left me wondering what she was saying exactly.I hope no one finds this review harsh I love Mrs Butterfield s ministry and her other books and deeply respect her But, as someone who is very involved in hospitality I was hoping this book would motivate, challenge, encourage, and comfort For me, it didn t do any of those things It felt like a whole lot of try harder, do better and do it like me Since I can t and I m not her, it was defeating Honestly, I didn t find much of the gospel made available for me in this book I found a lot of law. This is a revised review At about 30% in I thought I couldn t take it any and called it quits, but I decided to tough it out and complete the book so this is my updated review on the whole thing It s pretty rare for me to consider quitting a book esp multiple times , but for reasons explained below this book had that effect on me.First, I had a really hard time getting through this book in the audio version The reader, who is the author, reads so slowly and with such overly dramatic emphasis that I often had a hard time paying attention The pace was just way to drawn out I felt like I was being held captive to one tedious monologue after another Apparently there is some iTunes hack to increase the playback speed but I haven t figured it out yet If and that s a big IF even though it has been highly recommended I read her book about her conversion, I would definitely get the paperback and read it at my own speed The tedium was compounded by the excessive story telling Actual instruction or advice was sprinkled seemingly randomly in paragraph after paragraph after paragraph of personal stories that are overly stylized and riddled with what felt like faux humility or humble brags going by today s vernacular The author, trying to be warm, funny or relevant, includes a mind numbing level of detail in her anecdotes like which version of monopoly her kids were playing at the table and the names and vocal characteristics of the singers on the CD she was listening to In fact, most of anything that could be considered teaching is in the preface and conclusion including almost half of the takeaways I list below Unless you really want to read about her life, you could just read those two sections about a half hour of out nine hours and you d get about as much out of it as I did This book really needs to be billed as a memoir This is the story of my life and how I do hospitality watch, learn and imitate To her credit, the author believes that the Bible is inerrant, inspired, authoritative, unified revelation and I thought she did a good job of showing a balance between loving people while not approving of their sin She usually demonstrates good theology though I thought some of her Bible interpretation was a stretch, detailed below and I believe she truly loves people and that God is working good out of her experiences like he is doing with all Christians She challenges the reader to think about hospitality in a new way to be radical about reaching out in ordinary ways I appreciated her example in this If you re looking for of a casual, chatty life story memoir about hospitality, this book may be interesting for you There were a few tidbits that caught my attention in this book about Radically Ordinary Hospitality a phrase which was repeated so frequently that it has been seared into my brain and is defined as using your Christian home in a daily way that seeks to make strangers neighbors, and neighbors family of God I appreciated the following challenging, though often underdeveloped, thoughts 1 Build margin into your lifestyle and live intentionally below your means so that you are ready and proactive about being hospitable 2 Hosts and guests are interchangeable You re always one or the other and the role changes often.3 Your words can be only as strong as your relationships Do I have the grace to say less than everything I could say about something 4 No body approves of everybody or everything When someone challenges you about your disapproval of something, remind them that no one approves of everything and that s ok We all disagree with each other on all kinds of big and small issues and can still be friends and be kind respectful with each other.5 My words are not pep talks Invest in your neighbors for the long haul the hundreds of conversations that make up a neighborhood Don t see your words as sneaky evangelistic raids 6 Recognize our own sin and that while claiming the name of Christ and don t dwell on your neighbors sin Stop treating people as caricatures of an alien worldview Love the sinner hate your own sin.7 Understand the difference between holiness and goodness don t be afraid to celebrate the goodness of your neighbors because of God s common grace.8 Be good company to those who are struggling be near 9 God may use our time and resources and selves as a way of escape for others.10 Christians are not called to be desperate people even in desperate times, but to do God s work.Many of these points were mentioned almost offhandedly blink and you ll miss it And many of them are book ended by what felt like self righteous and authoritative judgments about how exactly to do hospitality and how exactly not to do hospitality I felt that her words communicated a sense of superiority in both her past as if she was proud of just how anti Christian she was and how much she despised believers and her present as if only someone from her background could see people the way she does She writes that God calls us to serve and give and not get credit for either, but her entire book reads like a highlight reel from her life of hospitality with superfluous details that seemed to be fishing for admiration and designed to enhance the reader s perception of her dedication and self sacrifice She went as far as to include an example of their weekly schedule, replete with all of the things she does for other people in it While some may appreciate the concrete examples of how she serves and demonstrates hospitality, for me, it was way over the top Meanwhile, she is very adamant that the barista at Starbucks and the Airbnb host are practicing counterfeit hospitality because they get paid for their efforts apparently she doesn t feel the same way about the fact that her husband gets paid to do ministry as a pastor Even though she relates so many things to hospitality so much so that the word loses meaning , she suddenly will get very particular about what doesn t count as hospitality according to her The goal of relating so many topics to hospitality, I think, causes her to misinterpret scripture She regularly assumes the motivation and emotions of Bible characters and even writes in the preface that if Mary Magdalene had written a book about hospitality it would read like this one She gives as an example of hospitality the exchange between Jesus and some of his disciples on the road to Emmaus after his resurrection The author writes that Jesus was being hospitable by listening to their sadness about everything that had happened and encouraging them, but she completely leaves out his rebuke he calls them fools and slow of heart for not believing what the prophets had written She also includes the story of Jesus naming Judas as his betrayer as an example relating to hospitality merely because they were at the table when it happened and claimed that table fellowship somehow provided a natural context for this exchange In these cases, she seems to expand her understanding of hospitality to any exchange between at least two people, but in other areas of the book especially when it concerns other peoples efforts she is less generous Toward the end of the book she contrasts what her family does with an extended critique of a family that they know who sets out only two extra seats for guests at their table and she only knows about this practice from what her son told her about what their son told him there s no indication that she s ever actually talked to the adults about their lifestyle firsthand She claims that that family s idol of family time will keep them from ever practicing hospitality the way that God commands which I guess is always inviting your entire 300 home neighborhood over for a grill out She writes that making the Lord s day a family day steals glory from God and she even dramatizes the way she talked about that family in a very negative way, calling them the two chairs only family in a very purposefully miserly tone as if that one decision defines them as a family These comments deeply undercutting her encouragement to her readers to start anywhere you can with your hospitality , to be sure, are less than hospitable and I think would be downright hurtful if that family ever read the account Indeed, she talks about a lot of people she knows sometimes using their full names in a way that I doubt endears her to them I got the feeling that she included so many names to make the point that she knows and interacts with so many people, but she often describes them and their words with condescension and sometimes flat out mockery I wondered many times throughout the book if she had gotten permission from all of these people to make them look like the ignorant, naively wide eyed or selfishly misguided character so she could look like the enlightened, self sacrificing, godly one The story of her neighbor, Hank, which was told so extensively and repeatedly throughout the book that it seemed to be beat to death, included some pretty negative descriptions and intimate details I m assuming that she must have had his and his girlfriend s permission since half the book is about him If not, I think I would feel pretty used if someone had written that much about me to the whole world Likewise, when people left their church, she assigned them wrong motivations and doesn t seem to mind that if they read her book they would likely be offended with her the pastor s wife analysis of them When her neighbors were concerned about a neighbor being busted for having a meth lab she made them out to be selfish and cowardly with misplaced worries When neighbors were apprehensive about an unknown pit bull roaming the neighborhood she painted them as unfeeling and alarmist She even implies that the biblical teaching of 1 Corinthians 15 33 bad company corrupts good character is a cop out when evaluating how to handle the knowledge that your neighbor is doing meth If I knew this woman in person, I would be very apprehensive after reading this book to say anything around her that might end up as an example of what not to do in one of her future books It s obvious that she sees her way of doing hospitality as the best and most legitimate, often using the phrase at our house to distinguish between their way and how others do things, frequently identifying them by name Near the end of the book she writes, There are, of course, other ways you can use your days, your time, your money and your home, but opening your front door and greeting neighbors with soup, bread and the words of Jesus are the most important The author brings up the issue of the worldwide refugee crisis several times and, while it doesn t really bother me that she has an opinion on this, she is very authoritative about her thoughts on these and many other issues She claims it s an act of willful violence to not live out hospitality in the different ways she describes and that it s deadly to ignore God s teaching about caring for the stranger At the same time, she shares that her neighborhood is fighting the new development of homes that is in the works for the land next to them because that land is needed as a buffer from the highway and for wildlife She wrote often of the felons and prisoners that they invited into their home as if it were the most normal thing to do, but then said she hated herself and felt she was misguided for bringing her atheist mom to live with them, writing that she doubted whether or not her mother would ever change and questioning if she should keep giving her second chances The author mentions her neighbor s dog a million times how much her kids loved the dog and how much it opened the door into her neighbor s world , but she makes light of her ordeal in dealing with a different neighbor s dying cat joking with her family about whether or not there was enough space in the freezer to keep it until the owners get home and leaving it alone for almost a whole day bleeding on the floor without calling a vet She then pats herself on the back with the statement that if they didn t love their neighbors they wouldn t be making space in their freezer for a dead cat I was appalled at her whole description of that situation I can t imagine what the owners would think if they ever read it The inconsistently in her arguments and attitudes was frustrating, especially because the tone in which she stated her opinions came off as so smug.Butterfield writes of the strained relationship she had with her mom, who eventually did make some sort of profession of faith in the days before her death It s always encouraging to hear of an example of someone so opposed to Christ being changed, but I disagreed with the author s reflections on the matter She writes that it was being on her deathbed that brought her mom to the point of salvation and, while I don t dispute that God used that in her life, she then goes on to say that not everyone can come to Christ in the fullness of life, but anyone can come to Christ on their deathbed Because she believed that her mom needed to be made physically weak in order understand her frailty and spiritual need, she makes a claim that I think perhaps inadvertently denies the sovereignty of God over anyone s heart at ANY time perceived strength or not She adds that her mom s salvation changed the past and made her suffering a mark of God s providence What if her mom had not been saved Does her suffering lose all meaning Does not God make sense of all suffering whether or not those who have hurt us become saved in the end These thoughts are, I think, the outcome of an attempt to process the situation emotionally, not theologically.The author s writing style quickly wore me down and I was very impatient for the book to conclude which I m sure plays a part in my overall reception of it I found that she often took a paragraph or two to communicate one sentence s worth of material Her flowery, emotional language was too dramatic, seeking for a reaction, and, in my opinion, self congratulating for me It felt like she was trying too hard to be poetic and there were times where I think it got in the way of whatever message she was trying to communicate I ended up with the feeling that she likes to write than she likes to communicate anything in particular which resulted in this book being so much longer than it needed to be in my opinion In a recommendation I recently received for her book Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert she was praised for being a great writer so my impatience with her style is somewhat a matter of taste Others may appreciate her style as warm and descriptive Her style of speaking also made it harder for me to get through the book Not realizing at first that the author is the reader of the audiobook, I originally thought the reader of the audiobook was party to blame for the sensation that I was being scolded for my naive, conservative Christian perspective that ignorantly sees others as evil and has to be enlightened by someone who has come from the other side as to how to treat people Learning that the author is the reader about halfway through made it difficult for me to get past her often smug sounding tone and the fact that apparently she s reading it exactly the way she wants it understood disdain and all Her communication style just came off as reprimanding me and bragging about her and, combined with the slow pace, I think I would have been much better off reading the text myself.Despite everything I struggled to appreciate about this book, I was impressed by their lifestyle I m not sure that wasn t part of the point of the book , but the author really didn t leave much room for the possibility that not everyone is called to live like they do There are some very brief caveats in the conclusion like being on the same page with your spouse , but they are counteracted by her criticism of anyone who isn t making their entire lifestyle revolve around her idea of hospitality In a few different chapters she relates stories of her childhood in which she struggled and she wonders, Did I have Christian neighbors who could have helped Who knew This seems, in part, to fuel her desire to reach out to her neighbors and I think that s great, but I also know that God s plan for her life was designed specifically for her good and his glory and that the supposed absence of Christian neighbors getting involved was not God s plan being thwarted, nor should that thought drive us into an unhealthy obsession with trying to save everyone through radical hospitality God has clearly blessed and equipped Butterfield to reach out in kindness and service to her neighbors in a unique way and God is to be praised for everything he brings out of that effort Her example is one way in which a believer has been influenced by God through their hardships, their education, their family of origin, their marriage, their physical surroundings, etc to serve him I felt that she missed the point that God is doing this all over the world in ways that may look very different even radically different from how God is using her Her attempt to relate everything back to hospitality got to feel like a justification for how they choose to live than an encouragement to think biblically about how each believer should use their gifts in this particular area I understand that the author has had quite the transformation coming out of lesbianism when she got saved and I am thankful that she is willing to write about her testimony and I think God is glorified in her heart for serving others I don t doubt that she will influence many and that God will continue to use her to further his kingdom However, there were so many little digs at the way other people mostly Christians think and act that, even though she writes with the inclusive we when speaking of Christians, I sensed that she didn t really feel a part of those Christians who don t understand things like she does I admit that Christians need to be confronted about these issues and that I have a lot to learn about how to love as Christ loved, but between her off putting tone, rigid opinions of exactly what hospitality is, stretchy Biblical interpretation and inconsistent judgments, I did not enjoy the book Nevertheless, it has given some food for thought about being intentional with my neighbors and, as mentioned above, there were a handful of thoughts that I appreciated.